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- Dream on Dreamers. Sky is the limit -

Raise your standards

 
 
 
 
This is the first entry of my new column " Dating Wip Cream". For girls out there who are frustrated by their past relationships, love and lost. Stop second guessing, and confused over the male species. Afterall they are not that complicated!
 
* * *
 
 
Here are the five different relationship scenarios based on the premise that people want to gain pleasure and avoid pain:

The Big One: High pleasure/low pain
A Friend: Medium pleasure/low pain
Acquaintances Low pleasure/low pain
Crazy Love High pleasure/high pain
The Enemy Low pleasure/high pain

So what do you look for in a man in order to enjoy pleasure and avoid pain consistently over time?

If you look closely and evaluate wisely, there are some intelligent ways to see through the clever disguises of men. Here are some good reasons why you shouldn’t be into these guys either:

HE’S A LOSER, NOT A WINNER
A person with winning traits is the only one who will be capable of delivering consistent pleasure and very little pain. Remember that all big fish are winners. Don’t waste your precious time, energy, and emotion on long-shot losers. Their excuses of bad luck rarely change.


HE FLUNKS THE CHEMISTRY TEST
A Greek proverb reads, “Love can not grow without passion.” If a man doesn’t drive your passion, you have no chance at the big romance, even if he has a fat wallet. Remember to go for a man who turns you on, not off. There is no substitute for chemistry.


HE’S “A CHARACTER” WITH NO CHARACTER
Men can be very charming with their manly strengths and boyish personalities. But underneath a man’s charm lies a foundation of character. If consistent, lasting, and fulfilling love is your objective, character is one of your only reliable indicators.


HE’S A COOL GUY, BUT WITH NO WARMTH
An undeniable and mysterious part of us seems to be attracted to cool, aloof people. But if you want a relationship with warmth, caring, sensitivity, and compassion, be sure that the ones you want also possess these vital emotional qualities for love. A man can only give away to you what he possesses inside.


HE’S A LIFESTYLE MISMATCH, NOT A MATCH
Even the most charming, attractive, and exciting men may not be right for you. If you don’t have similar values and lifestyles, differences may start to accumulate, deepen, and widen. Remember that opposites may attract initially, but tend to repel consistently over time. In the long-run, similar values and lifestyle habits create the most secure and lasting relationship bonds. So while differences may be welcomed in style (and create some interesting relationship blends), they are not in substance.


YOU HAVE A PERSONALITY CLASH, NOT A COMPLIMENT
There’s no denying that everyone enjoys the company of an interesting person with a so-called “good personality.” However some personalities will blend better with yours than others. Repeated personality conflict usually means a large amount of emotional pain. Choose harmony instead of conflict in a loving relationship if you truly want secure, long-term, and consistent happiness.


HIS RELATIONSHIP GOALS END AT THE 50 YARD LINE
Unfortunately, a lot of men only want as much pleasure as they can get with the least amount of work, time, or commitment. The best that they want is a part-time girlfriend with occasional exceptions of romance. If there is no promise of him becoming a true full-time partner, then you have to realize that he not interested in going all the way in the relationship sense, not the sexual one.

*THE BOTTOM LINE: There is nothing simple about men whether it is trying to catch them or understand them. But an intelligent approach to defining exactly what you want and what you don’t want will lead you in the right direction toward love and happiness and away from pain and suffering.

Inconvenient Truth

 
 
There is nothing you can say
 nothing you can do
nothing in between
nothing left to face
nothing left to lose
I don't do FWB, babe
I don't
 
When they say you are not that strong
you are not that weak
I feel what I feel
I'm ending this
cuz It's not enough
What you have is not real
I'm sorry
I'm out
 
This mess
I'll clean it up and move on
 
When I kiss you for the last time
it's the last time
Babe,goodbye
 
life is messy,sometimes,
we pick up , we let go , we pick up again
 
 
 

The L word

 
 
 
 
同性之爱
 
 
 
 

Snowy

 

 

 

snow - falling angle

blowing away  dusty thoughts

life, love & lost  

moment of being

we laugh and cry

cry and laugh.

 

 

My life without me

 
 
Ann: You don't know who or what you're praying to, but you pray. You don't even regret the life that you're not gonna have, because by then you'll be dead. And the dead don't feel anything. Not even regret.

In the station of Metro

 

 

 

The apparition of these faces in the crowd; 
Petals on a wet, black bough.

  -- By Pound

 

 

 

 

Imagine

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Imagine there's no heaven,
It's easy if you try,
No hell below us,
Above us only sky,
Imagine all the people
living for today...
Imagine there's no countries,
It isnt hard to do,
Nothing to kill or die for,
No religion too,
Imagine all the people
living life in peace...
You may say Im a dreamer,
but Im not the only one,
I hope some day you'll join us,
And the world will live as one.
Imagine no possesions,
I wonder if you can,
No need for greed or hunger,
A brotherhood of man,
imagine all the people
Sharing all the world...
You may say Im a dreamer,
but Im not the only one,
I hope some day you'll join us,
And the world will live as one.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

-

 
 

 
  

年末的故事,雪球样的

让我完整的破碎一下

不过血肉横飞,才是快意——

Afterall, we had our moments

无论错误或游戏

 

 

 

25th bday

had a very happy bDay indeed

Charlotte Perkins Gilman optimist reformer

 
 
 
 
最近在读有关 Charlotte Perkins Gilman 的书,下面这段话,很有火花!
 
“Women need to learn from men to value and use reasoned thinking, for only in that way can we free ourselves from the beliefs that we accept as given but that are, in reality, learned: religious acceptance of obedience and self-sacrifice; belif in blind transcending love; belief in the existence of maternal instinct.”
        
----Her Legacy for the 1990s by ANN J. LANE
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Foto 1 de 16

Lin Chen

He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how---Friedrich Nietzsche